The silence....

It feels so calm.....The noises inside my head seem to have gone away. I don't hear that grating noise inside my head which used to remind me of people stepping on broken glass with boots. I am beginning to like the idea of going to sleep, knowing that I am not going to wake up in the middle with a jarring noise in my head. It is so silent. I can now hear other sounds. Beautiful sounds....Every passing day does not seem to be a chore anymore. Everything I buy does not have an emptiness attached with it. Everything I eat seems to have taste again. And most of all....the people......The people around me are fun to be with. I do not just hang out there wondering what I was doing in a crowd of people who know nothing about me. I am beginning to look forward to hanging around with people.

I have seen things which I should not have...I carry the baggage of the past still. But thinking that I could throw the load off my back was probably a mistake. Only now do I realize that all this while I was so weak and that was why the baggage seemed heavy. But now, everything feels light. The weight on my head seems so trivial now. This new wonderful feeling somehow seems to make me stronger than ever.

I love this new silence. I love the peace I feel. I feel like I am beginning to heal. There is a soft voice, a beautiful laugh, and a warm glow to this new person I am becoming. And there is a little girl with a cute nose, holding her hand out to me. All I want to do right now, is take her hand and let her lead me away.....far away from everything. I love her and I love what she has done to me.